I realized something interesting the other day, and I wanted to share it with "you." Considering that I have no idea who reads this, or if anybody reads this at all, I put "you" in quotes. But that is the nature of having a blog. Illusory intimacy with an online audience.
Anyways, facebook was recently flooded with an interesting fad in which people write down 25 random facts about themselves and post it in a note. Then they tag people, and those people are supposed to write 25 random things about themselves. I have many thoughts about the activity itself, but I actually want to talk about a random fact that someone wrote about themselves.
Here is what this person wrote (paraphrased):
4 (or 14 I have no idea)- I hate waking up to the morning sun. I feel so disgusting with the rays of sunlight beaming on my face.
I really enjoyed this, because I have actually felt the exact same way. There have been many mornings where I have woken up, felt the penetrating rays of the sun baking my already sweaty and oily body, and wanted to die, or at least cuss somebody out.
I recently heard a talk on the "wrath of God." According to the speaker, God's wrath is simply the exposure of sinful humanity to God's holy presence.
Without the sun, we would all die. Plants could not live, animals could not reproduce (or eat the plants), and we would all go crazy for many special physiological reasons. Therefore it is arguable that the sun is a good thing. So why do I hate the sun when it exposes the disgustingness of my body after a night of sweaty sleep? Why do I curse the sun when it pounds into my eyes, used to a night of darkness? For that very reason. In the darkness and cold, our bodily secretions are not as noticiable. They do not irritate us nearly as much. My eyes are comfortable in darkness, and the sudden exposure of light throws the balance off.
If the morning sun makes me feel disgusting, how will I react to the presence of God? In the words of C.S. Lewis, do I like goodness I much as I have supposed?
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Orthodox Christianity and Genetic Engineering: Part I
How would one relate the two subjects, you may ask? Well, I don't really plan on relating them at all. They have just been on my mind recently.
I have known about Orthodoxy for a long time now, since about my sophomore year when I met the one Orthodox Christian in my fraternity. Quite honestly, I have always found many parts of it appealing. Interestingly enough, the same parts that make it appealing also keep me from wanting to be Orthodox. For example, Orthodox Christians are sacramental, meaning they believe that in order to properly experience the presence of God, one must participate in certain rituals, or sacraments. These include (this is not an exhaustive list) baptism, communion, confession, and even marriage. No Orthodox Christian will say that this is the only way to experience God's presence. Certainly, many Protestants and Catholics experience God's presence in a legitimate way. Every Orthodox Christian will say that participating in the sacraments is the best way, though. Of course, Protestants will make analogous statements about Catholics, and Catholics, the Orthodox. Sacramentalism appeals to me because there is a beauty in being able to experience the presence of God in a time-tested way. It bothers me because I have been raised to believe that our salvation is not based on what we do, but what God does. Of course one could argue that salvation and experiencing the presence of God are very different things, but I would argue that they are very closely related. The one is evidence of the other. Not universal proof, mind you, but evidence.
The fact that Christianity is so divided bothers me. Many people will say: "Well when you get down to it, we all share the same basic beliefs." This seems ridiculous. If we all basically agreed, there would be no reason for so many churces to exist. Yes, perhaps you could say that all Christians believe that Jesus was God incarnate, that He died on the cross and rose again for our sins. But even in something as fundamental as this, there is a huge difference in opinion among the Christian churches. What does it meant to "die for our sins?" What does it mean for Jesus to be God incarnate? Orthodox, Protestants, and Catholics have very different thoughts about this. Maybe not so much about the person of Jesus, but definitely about the work of the Cross. The point of all this is that I think somebody has to be right, or at least more correct than everyone else. I am beginning to wonder if this is perhaps Orthodoxy. If so, why did it take so long for Americans to begin to recognize the church? One of the biggest weaknesses of the church is its tendency to closely tied to a specific ethnic group. Greek Orthodox, Russian Orthodox, Armenian Orthodox, etc. But nonetheless, before Orthodoxy emerged in the public consciousness, was the entirely of American Christianity in apostasy? I find this difficult to believe.
Stay tuned for Part II
I have known about Orthodoxy for a long time now, since about my sophomore year when I met the one Orthodox Christian in my fraternity. Quite honestly, I have always found many parts of it appealing. Interestingly enough, the same parts that make it appealing also keep me from wanting to be Orthodox. For example, Orthodox Christians are sacramental, meaning they believe that in order to properly experience the presence of God, one must participate in certain rituals, or sacraments. These include (this is not an exhaustive list) baptism, communion, confession, and even marriage. No Orthodox Christian will say that this is the only way to experience God's presence. Certainly, many Protestants and Catholics experience God's presence in a legitimate way. Every Orthodox Christian will say that participating in the sacraments is the best way, though. Of course, Protestants will make analogous statements about Catholics, and Catholics, the Orthodox. Sacramentalism appeals to me because there is a beauty in being able to experience the presence of God in a time-tested way. It bothers me because I have been raised to believe that our salvation is not based on what we do, but what God does. Of course one could argue that salvation and experiencing the presence of God are very different things, but I would argue that they are very closely related. The one is evidence of the other. Not universal proof, mind you, but evidence.
The fact that Christianity is so divided bothers me. Many people will say: "Well when you get down to it, we all share the same basic beliefs." This seems ridiculous. If we all basically agreed, there would be no reason for so many churces to exist. Yes, perhaps you could say that all Christians believe that Jesus was God incarnate, that He died on the cross and rose again for our sins. But even in something as fundamental as this, there is a huge difference in opinion among the Christian churches. What does it meant to "die for our sins?" What does it mean for Jesus to be God incarnate? Orthodox, Protestants, and Catholics have very different thoughts about this. Maybe not so much about the person of Jesus, but definitely about the work of the Cross. The point of all this is that I think somebody has to be right, or at least more correct than everyone else. I am beginning to wonder if this is perhaps Orthodoxy. If so, why did it take so long for Americans to begin to recognize the church? One of the biggest weaknesses of the church is its tendency to closely tied to a specific ethnic group. Greek Orthodox, Russian Orthodox, Armenian Orthodox, etc. But nonetheless, before Orthodoxy emerged in the public consciousness, was the entirely of American Christianity in apostasy? I find this difficult to believe.
Stay tuned for Part II
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Tahoe! (and some resulting introspection)
I had made big plans to road trip out to Seattle this past weekend, but unfortunately, huge snowstorms in the Cascades prevented this from happening. Ironically, Seattle itself was sunny the whole weekend. Tangentially, out of all of the times I have visited Seattle, it has been sunny 90% of the time. Guess I just bring that California sunshine right along with me. (yes, I know it's a sappy sentiment, and I don't apologize for it... I'm proud of being a Californian.)
Anyways, instead of getting stuck in snowstorms in the Cascades, I decided to do the same thing in the Sierras. Some good family friends had their annual ski trip in Tahoe, and they invited me along. I needed to get away from Davis, so I jumped on that invitation.
Normally, it takes about 2 hours to get from Davis to Tahoe if you take highway 80. Due to the inclement weather, it took us much longer. They picked me up at about 6:30am, and we didn't get to the cabin until about 1:00pm. But once we got there, we had a great time.
Let me pause here and give a plug for a drink called a "hot toddy." As I understand it, the drink is basically bourbon and apple cider. I had a pretty bad cold when I drank it, but as soon as I took the first sip, I cleared right up! Of course, you should probably take my advice with a grain of salt, according to this article from Wikipedia. This article also gives more accurate information on what the drink actually is.
Anyways, I had a great time skiing and spending time with friends. If you let me, I could gush on and on about the family friends that I went with. The mom is so caring and has such a deep faith. The dad is a man's man. He gets done what he needs to get done, and doesn't waste too much time with unnecessary talking, but you still know that he cares about his family. The children (five of them) are all so fun and smart. It is so great to hang out with them. I've known their oldest daughter essentially since we were born. She is awesome, and continues to increase in awesomeness the longer I know her. I am really grateful to have friends like them.
Having to go back home was actually pretty depressing. Seeing the love that my friends experienced and shared in their family reminded me of the impoverished state of my relationships in Davis. Also, I had a fun time with them and missed them. But getting back to my dissatisfaction with my social life in Davis, I am exaggerating quite a bit to call my relationships impoverished. The problem is mostly me. I don't really spend a lot of time trying to get to know people, and for the most part, I don't want to. I partially rationalize this by telling myself that I have to focus on getting good grades so that I can go to grad school. Deep down, though, I know that's not true. Truthfully, I am scared of relationships. I am scared of being hurt, manipulated, and rejected. I am also scared of doing those very things to someone else. At least, I was scared at one point. I think it's more like tired now. The fact is, pain, manipulation, and rejection are just parts of human relationships. If we didn't take that risk, we would all just own dogs and find relational fulfillment in that. We risk all the bad stuff because we can find great joy, love, and acceptance from other people. But I am tired of what seems like a long line of pain. I don't feel like I have enough energy to reject and be rejected. Of course, in admitting this, I am also admitting that I am looking at the whole picture upside down.
Let me emphasize that I have excellent friends in Davis, as well as many excellent potential friends. I am mostly saying that two things. One, I have been a supremely poor friend. Two, seeing my old friends made me realize that there is something better than what I have, and I didn't even realize it. I heard a great quote in a sermon this week and I think it gives a pretty good response to this rant.
"We make a living by what we get. What we give makes a life."
Anyways, instead of getting stuck in snowstorms in the Cascades, I decided to do the same thing in the Sierras. Some good family friends had their annual ski trip in Tahoe, and they invited me along. I needed to get away from Davis, so I jumped on that invitation.
Normally, it takes about 2 hours to get from Davis to Tahoe if you take highway 80. Due to the inclement weather, it took us much longer. They picked me up at about 6:30am, and we didn't get to the cabin until about 1:00pm. But once we got there, we had a great time.
Let me pause here and give a plug for a drink called a "hot toddy." As I understand it, the drink is basically bourbon and apple cider. I had a pretty bad cold when I drank it, but as soon as I took the first sip, I cleared right up! Of course, you should probably take my advice with a grain of salt, according to this article from Wikipedia. This article also gives more accurate information on what the drink actually is.
Anyways, I had a great time skiing and spending time with friends. If you let me, I could gush on and on about the family friends that I went with. The mom is so caring and has such a deep faith. The dad is a man's man. He gets done what he needs to get done, and doesn't waste too much time with unnecessary talking, but you still know that he cares about his family. The children (five of them) are all so fun and smart. It is so great to hang out with them. I've known their oldest daughter essentially since we were born. She is awesome, and continues to increase in awesomeness the longer I know her. I am really grateful to have friends like them.
Having to go back home was actually pretty depressing. Seeing the love that my friends experienced and shared in their family reminded me of the impoverished state of my relationships in Davis. Also, I had a fun time with them and missed them. But getting back to my dissatisfaction with my social life in Davis, I am exaggerating quite a bit to call my relationships impoverished. The problem is mostly me. I don't really spend a lot of time trying to get to know people, and for the most part, I don't want to. I partially rationalize this by telling myself that I have to focus on getting good grades so that I can go to grad school. Deep down, though, I know that's not true. Truthfully, I am scared of relationships. I am scared of being hurt, manipulated, and rejected. I am also scared of doing those very things to someone else. At least, I was scared at one point. I think it's more like tired now. The fact is, pain, manipulation, and rejection are just parts of human relationships. If we didn't take that risk, we would all just own dogs and find relational fulfillment in that. We risk all the bad stuff because we can find great joy, love, and acceptance from other people. But I am tired of what seems like a long line of pain. I don't feel like I have enough energy to reject and be rejected. Of course, in admitting this, I am also admitting that I am looking at the whole picture upside down.
Let me emphasize that I have excellent friends in Davis, as well as many excellent potential friends. I am mostly saying that two things. One, I have been a supremely poor friend. Two, seeing my old friends made me realize that there is something better than what I have, and I didn't even realize it. I heard a great quote in a sermon this week and I think it gives a pretty good response to this rant.
"We make a living by what we get. What we give makes a life."
Saturday, February 7, 2009
Eta Colony Visit!
I was close to crashing yesterday. The week had been pretty intense due to school, busyness, and all the other things that make life stressful. In this light, I wasn't really looking forward to spending valuable study time in Fresno, where the Eta chapter of my fraternity, Alpha Gamma Omega, is in the process of re-founding. Just for background, fraternities have multiple chapters, one per college or university, and the chapters are given a letter in the Greek alphabet according to the order in which they were founded. For example, the first chapter of my fraternity was founded at UCLA, and is known as the Alpha chapter. The second chapter, at Cal, is the Beta chapter, and so on. My chapter, at UC Davis, would be referred to as the Iota chapter. This would make it the ninth founded chapter of the fraternity. The Eta chapter, at CSU Fresno, was the eighth, but the chapter dissolved, and now some guys are attempting to start it up again. At this point, Eta is at colony status, and will be considered a full fledged chapter of the fraternity once they maintain their numbers for a year.
In any case, all my apprehension dissolved once I met the guys. They were all really laid back and fun. Additionally you have to have a lot of respect for them. Starting up a fraternity is tough work. They are essentially pledging the fraternity and running the fraternity at the same time. Having participated in both of these processes, I can honestly say that the guys at Eta must be superhuman. On top of all of this, they were fasting for the weekend to prepare for rush. I felt pretty guilty scarfing down the muffins and fruit they had bought for us while they sat there with their mouths watering.
They didn't make a big deal out of it, though, and we had a really fun time. We drove into the Sierras (it was about 1 and a half hours), and went tubing in the snow. I ate it quite a few times, and considering the fact that I didn't have any gloves or boots, I froze pretty quickly. I froze with a smile on my face though. I got to play Balderdash for the first time, and I got to meet ADX girls from CSU Fresno. ADX is our sister sorority. The ADX girls from Fresno were pretty cute.
Anyways, enough about cute girls. Incidentally, I have a friend who is adamantly opposed to calling females over 20 "girls." This makes a lot of sense, but it is such a habit for me to call members of the opposite gender "girls," that it will be tough to break it! But again, enough about gals, let's move on from women (how can I, I'm a single twenty-something!).
I think the best way to sum all of this up is this: I am basically married to my fraternity. We have reached the point in our marriage where I am starting to resent the inane commitments that my fraternity requires of me. I love it nonetheless, though, and I will miss the guys that make it up dearly when I graduate. This fraternity has provided me with so much. The gratitude I feel for Alpha Gamma Omega is difficult to put into words. Maybe I should take a page out of the Eta colonies' book and give back, as much as I might not feel like it at the time.
In any case, all my apprehension dissolved once I met the guys. They were all really laid back and fun. Additionally you have to have a lot of respect for them. Starting up a fraternity is tough work. They are essentially pledging the fraternity and running the fraternity at the same time. Having participated in both of these processes, I can honestly say that the guys at Eta must be superhuman. On top of all of this, they were fasting for the weekend to prepare for rush. I felt pretty guilty scarfing down the muffins and fruit they had bought for us while they sat there with their mouths watering.
They didn't make a big deal out of it, though, and we had a really fun time. We drove into the Sierras (it was about 1 and a half hours), and went tubing in the snow. I ate it quite a few times, and considering the fact that I didn't have any gloves or boots, I froze pretty quickly. I froze with a smile on my face though. I got to play Balderdash for the first time, and I got to meet ADX girls from CSU Fresno. ADX is our sister sorority. The ADX girls from Fresno were pretty cute.
Anyways, enough about cute girls. Incidentally, I have a friend who is adamantly opposed to calling females over 20 "girls." This makes a lot of sense, but it is such a habit for me to call members of the opposite gender "girls," that it will be tough to break it! But again, enough about gals, let's move on from women (how can I, I'm a single twenty-something!).
I think the best way to sum all of this up is this: I am basically married to my fraternity. We have reached the point in our marriage where I am starting to resent the inane commitments that my fraternity requires of me. I love it nonetheless, though, and I will miss the guys that make it up dearly when I graduate. This fraternity has provided me with so much. The gratitude I feel for Alpha Gamma Omega is difficult to put into words. Maybe I should take a page out of the Eta colonies' book and give back, as much as I might not feel like it at the time.
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